WARNING…I will probably tick off a lot of people with this post.
If you are a dyed-in-the-wool “Obama-zombie”, or a delusional “Romney will fix it all” dreamer…best not even read this one. But if you can set your personal political opinions aside for a few minutes, you’ll get a good lesson in success (and see why I think ALL politicians suck).
So, if you are still reading you’ve got your head on straight, but probably still have been subjected to relentless political coverage for the last year or so…and its only getting worse.
The one thing that drive me bonkers in all of this…more than anything else…is the blame game.
And if he’s not blaming Bush, he’s blaming ATM’s, kiosks at airports, BP, the Arab Spring, Congress, and so many more.
Not once have I heard him say, “I’m the man in charge, and its my my fault.”
Now before I get blasted by liberals for being one-sided, the Republicans have been no different.
I haven’t heard any members of Congress state that the lack of progress was their fault.
Romney (and all the Republicans) has done very little so far but blame Obama for everything (we can only hope that if elected this doesn’t continue for the next 4 years).
This is exactly why things are so screwed up right now…and will continue to be, until “our leaders” learn to man-up (or woman-up…as the situation calls for) and say the 3 powerful words I’m going to share today.
These 3 words are the source of all the personal power you will ever need.
These 3 words will free you from everything that has ever held you back.
These 3 words are: “Its my fault.”
Yes, it’s that simple.
When you take responsibility, it shifts how you see yourself. You move from being a bystander to being an influential participant..in everything.
In contrast, someone who doesn’t take responsibility ends up reinforcing their own passivity, leaving themselves at the mercy of others. That’s an incredibly weakening position to be in that affects how you view yourself, and this view ends up manifesting itself in how others see you.
Here are 4 reasons to say always say, “Its my fault”:
1. Taking responsibility makes action possible.
People that take responsibility move from being impotent to being influential. People that see themselves as influential assume that it is possible to move into a bad situation and change it. In contrast, people who believe themselves to be impotent have no reason to even try to make a difference.
2. Taking responsibility sets the expectation, within yourself, that action is forthcoming.
Accepting responsibility for a negative outcome can lead to increased commitment to do better, because saying you’re wrong sets up a tension to be right the next time.
Have you ever heard someone say they’re sorry without suggesting that they’ll try harder or do something different the next time?
3. Taking responsibility leads you to take a new look at the bad situation, and to understand what and how you can do to fix the situation.
By taking responsibility for your part in creating a bad situation, you show that you have recognized that its earlier actions have somehow contributed to the negative result. Your next step is to understand what you did and what you could have done but chose not to do. Being able to see both the road taken and the roads not taken gives you a bigger picture of what actions were possible.
4. Taking responsibility makes it possible for you to learn and creates the possibility that your you will get it right the next time.
Once you accept that other actions were possible and that these other actions might have made a more positive contribution, you can analyze and understand why you chose the path you did. This builds your capacity for self-reflection and self-understanding. This capacity for self-reflection allows you to investigate the relationship between your actions, intent, and the actual outcome.
It’s hard to change your thinking to this method at first…but if you honestly evaluate everything in your adult life (there are things you can’t control as children), you will agree that everything is your fault (good or bad).
For example, a programmer ripped me and Tim off earlier this year for a nice chunk of money. Never delivered our product, and even sold what he did build for us to other marketers (after we paid him upfront).
Now you would think that Tim and would have fought about whose fault this was (Tim brought me into this project BUT I was the one who agreed to pay the programmer upfront after telling me his financial woes).
But the exact opposite happened…we argued that “this is all my fault bro…“.
We fought to TAKE THE BLAME.
I saw this again on Friday while out wake boarding with 2 other successful internet marketers. These 2 guys had a little miscommunication while trying something new on the water, and they both fought for a few minutes about it…they also FOUGHT TO TAKE THE BLAME.
This is a trait you will notice in successful people, and find vacant in unhappy/unsuccessful.
But the good thing is…this attitude is a conscious choice. You can start it right now.
Once you realize that you are 100% in control of everything that happens to you, its like you’re Neo in the Matrix and you realize have the ability to control almost everything. And that’s when you really start to get what you want from life.
Maybe its a little narcissistic, but it works.
Next time you are in an argument with someone, or start to get angry about a bad thing happening to you…stop and say out loud…’This is all my fault.’
..and you will instantly see what you could have done to prevent the situation. Plus it freak out your spouse/kids/coworker/etc.
Then move on.
Don’t be Obama/Romney and every politician in the world and play their “Blame Game”.
Take the red pill…be Neo and control everything around you.